Welcome to the Weird Lunch Bag - 8th Grade Edition

The first weird lunch bag of the 2016 - 2017 school year begins today, so I thought a bag welcoming Marie back to school would be appropriate.

It says:

"Welcome
To
The
Weird Lunch Bag
(8th Grade Edition)

PS. You're weird."

- Stay weird my friends.

Weird Lunch Bag - Summer Edition: An International Lunch bag

Internationally speaking...

It says "Weirdo" in several different languages.  Google Translate is awesome! 

The languages I used are (in no particular order):

• Spanish
• French
• Icelandic
• Arabic
• Japanese
• Korean
• Norwegian
• Polish
• Urdu
• Hindi

-Stay weird, my friends.

Weird Lunch Bag - Summer Edition: Welcome to Summer

We have another summer class for Marie, which means another summer time lunch bag.

I like the sun

"Welcome to SUMMER"

-Stay weird, my friends.

Weird Lunch Bag - Summer Edition: You are falling under my power.

Look into the spinning vortex of words.

It says:

"Look into the spnnning vortex of my words.  You are getting sleepy.  You are slowly falling under my spell.  You will repeat after me, "I am falling under the spell of the lunch bag.  I will give dad twenty dollars."

I will let you know how Marie reacted later.

Until then,

-Stay weird, my friends.

Weird Lunch Bag - Summer Edition: Nobody expects the Weird Lunch Bag

It's a special SUMMER edition of the Weird Lunch Bag Blog.




Marie is taking a summer babysitting class and she needed to bring her lunch and, of course, I'm not going to let the opportunity for a weird decorated lunch bag slip by.

"Wait...
What is this???

OMG!!!

It's another
Weird Lunch
BAG

Were you expecting this?  I wasn't, but then nobody expects the Weird lunch bag!!!"

The bag was already labeled with her name on the other side, so I decorated her bag and placed it with the other kids' bags.  She didn't bother to turn it around because she though her mother had made the lunch, then a little later that morning she came to me and said, "I'm such an idiot!", indicating to me that she saw the decorations.

We both had a good laugh.

- Stay weird, my friends.

A surprise lunch bag for the end of the year.

I decided to buy a bag of mixed "fun size" candy and put it in a special End of the School Year lunch bag so she could give it to her friends. 

Here is one side of the bag:

And here is the other side:

The whale is saying, "See you next year."
The cat is saying, "Meow!  Have fun this summer."
The ostrich is saying, "Go on vacation!"
The robot is saying, "You're weird!"
The sun is saying, "Get an awesome tan."
The butterfly is saying, "Sleep in, dude!"

I hope all of Marie's friends enjoyed their End of the Year candy. 

- Stay weird, my friends.

It would seem Marie and I have a fan base

Last Friday and again yesterday, Marie's friends sent me a couple of notes about my lunch bag decorations.

The note from Friday:

They like me.  They REALLY like me!

"The lunch bags are so weird and random!"
"Yes!"
"OMG the lunch bags are so darn awesome! I Luvvve them!"
"I love them :)"
"They is amerzing"




 The note from yesterday:

Apparently I'm known as "Marie's Dad".

"Dear Maries Dad,
I just wanted to
say that I'm a fan
of your lunch bag
art skills. 
They are so fab.

-Ashleigh 
Maries BFF"

Thank you, Ashleigh and all of Marie's friends for your kind words.  Rest assured the weirdness will resume at the beginning of the new school year.  Until then...

Stay weird, my friends.

The last lunch bag of the school year

Maire has 3 more days at her school, but they are half days, so today is the last day of the 2015-2016 school year that she will have a lunch bag.  I thought it would be appropriate to reflect and reminisce on her lunch bags that I've decorated.

 

"Marie, It's the last day of school where you will have a lunch.  Lets look back on previous lunch bags and reminisce on the weirdness"

There are 4 panels each showing a different bag from the past.

• Panel 1:  "Remember the poems?" and it shows a drawing of a bag saying, "Roses are red.  You're weird".
• Panel 2:  "Remember the jokes?" and the drawing shows a bag saying, "What did the ocean say to the shore?"
• Panel 3:  "How about the rainbows?" and the drawing shows a bag with a rainbow on it.
• Panel 4:  "Who could forget the dragon?" and the drawing shows a bag with a dragon on it.

At the bottom it says, "So many lunch bags.  So much weirdness.  Just remember one thing as summer approaches..."

The note inside the bag:

"Stay weird, and enjoy summer!"

The Weird Lunch Bag Blog will go on hiatus over the summer and resume at the beginning of the 2016-2017 school year.  Until then, stay weird, my friends.

I coudn't think of anything...

"Greetings Marie and Friends.
I couldn't think of anything
weird to write on today's bag,
so here's a picture of a dragon
riding a unicycle. "

-Stay weird, my friends.

Snoopy and the Hitchhiker's Guide

Snoopy and the Hitchhiker's Guide.

I used to draw a lot of Snoopy when I was a kid.  I got away from it, but I've always been able to draw Snoopy quite well, so I thought it might be nice on Marie's lunch bag today.  I'm also a HUGE Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy fan and it was the first thing I could think up for Snoopy to say.

Marie gave me a huge smile when she saw this:

"TIME IS AN ILLUSION.
LUNCHTIME, DOUBLY
SO."

- Stay weird, my friends.

She's a lot of things...

Marie... she's a lot of things.

It says:

Marie

"You're great.  Your awesome. 
You're cool.You're smart. 
You're amazing. 
You're marvelous.

but most of all...

You're Weird!"

-Stay weird, my friends.

A hypnotic lunch bag

Background:
So for the past few years, if I had a series of questions to ask my kids, I would always add in the additional question, "Will you give me $20?" just to see if they are paying attention.

Example:

Me:  Do you like your teacher?
Kid:  Yes.
Me:  Is she really nice?
Kid:  Yes.
Me: Does she make class fun?
Kid:  Yes.
Me:  Will you give me $20?
Kid:  No, Dad!

So it has become this running gag, that I decided to put on her lunch bag.

It says:
"Read the following out loud"
(and repeat)

I am getting very sleepy. 
I am under dad's spell. 
I will give dad twenty dollars!"

She still won't give me $20.  I guess I will have to keep trying.

-Stay weird, my friends.

A very weird question

What would YOU do?

"Hey Marie!

If you're driving down the road
on a motorcycle and a monkey
in a wheelchair breaks in
while you're rubbing chocolate
pudding on your cat's legs
and he starts violently beating
the rubber chick with a
barbequed (sic) dog's tail,

What would you
DO???"

Background:
When I was in high school, some friends of mine and I thought it was funny to come up with a bunch of "stupid" questions that made absolutely no sense. (We also had some stupid answers for these stupid questions that were equally nonsensical)  We wrote them down and they were sort of an inside joke between us.  This was one of the more... uh... creative questions we came up with.

Marie smiled.

-Stay weird, my friends.

Rainbow lunchbag

Its in color this time.

I thought I would color her bag today.  She smiled when she saw her bag this morning:

"WELCOME!
To your
RAINBOW
LUNCH BAG!!!"

Stay weird, my friends.

A rambling sort of lunch bag.

I went on... and on... and on...

Today's message:

"I don't know what I will write on your lunch bag today.  maybe I'll write another epic poen, or perhaps a funny joke.  Perhaps I'll draw a picture that will bring a smile to both the faces of your and your friends.  I'm not exactly sure.  Am I rambling?  If I'm rambling please let me know.  some people can just go on and on and on and on, but not me!  I can stop writing whenever I need to.  I don't see the point of continuing to write a lunch bag message just for the sake of writing.  I mean rambling on about nothing is pointless, don't you think?  Oh my!  I seem to be running out of room."

Stay weird, my friends.

May your days be fun.

Where do I come up with these?

Another poem for Marie:

"May your days be fun,
And your nights, not crazy.
Learn lots at school,
(And don't be lazy.)

May your food taste good,
May your windows be cleared.
But most of all,
May you always be weird."

-Stay weird, my friends.

A backwards message

It says:

"Marie,
In a continuing
effort to provide
new and original
messages for your lunch bags,
I am writing
this message
backwards. 
Enjoy, weirdo!"

Stay weird, my friends.

A riddle

 Today, it was a riddle:

"Q: What did the ocean say to the shore?"



 The answer inside the bag:

"A:  Nothing.  It just waved!"

Needless to say, Marie figured out the answer before even opening the bag.  I guess the joke was on me.

-Stay weird, my friends.

Not this bag!

Not this bag.

I felt compelled by an old Monty Python record this morning. 

It repeatedly says, "Not this bag!".

Marie just looked at me funny and said, "Why not this bag?"

- Stay weird, my friends.

This is a poem

This is a poem for Marie

"This is a poem for Marie,
It made it up on the spot.
Weirdest of the Weird is she,
And normal, she is not.

She never has flown a plane,
Nor sheep, she has not sheared.
But one thing I can certainly explain,
She's the Weirdest of the Weird."

Stay weird, my friends.

A bouqet of flowers

A bouquet of flowers

"A B O F F M


BYA A!"

Translated:
"A bouquet of flowers for Marie

Because you are AWESOME"

Stay weird, my friends.

Another coded lunch

Another enigmatic code.

Decoded it says:

"Marie,
You are awesome!!!
(but weird)

Love,
    Dad"

Stay weird, my friends.

Incredible!

It's INCREDIBLE!

"It's INCREDIBLE!
It's AMAZING!!!!!
It's OUT OF THIS WORLD!

It's...
            It's...

It's another decorated lunch bag."


- Stay weird, my friend.

A Question for her today

A question for Marie.

Today's lunch bag message:

"Q:  What is green, slimy, and has fungus growing on it?"
"A:  I don't know either, but its in your lunchbag."

What I left inside the bag.  

He he he!  I made her look again!

- Stay weird, my friends.

I'm back!!!I"

I'm sure she did.

The day after we came back from a week and a half vacation, I was pretty sure she missed her daily lunch bag decorations.

"I'm Back!!!
Did you Miss me????"


Stay weird, my friends.

Roses are red

 

My wife and I left on vacation for 2 weeks.  I knew I would not be able to decorate Marie's lunch bag every day, so I sneaked in a couple of surprise messages for while we were away.

 

"Roses are red
Violets are blue
We have left for vacation
And we already miss you!

-Mom and Dad

P.S.  You're still weird... The weirdest of the weird!"

Stay weird, my friends.

Don't open this lunchbag...

The Warning!

"DON'T open ths lunch bag!  There's and orange 7 legged snorkelwinkle in there.  You have been warned!"

Inside the bag

The note inside says, "Made you look!!"

- Stay weird, my friends.

W is for....

Marie laughed hard at this one today:

The letters in WEIRD stand for...

W.... is for your Weirdness
E... is for your Enormous weirdness
I... is for your Incredibly enormous weirdness
R... is for your Really incredibly enormous weirdness
D... is for... is for... uh...  Did I say that you are weird?


Stay weird, my friends.

Award for, "Most Weird".

"The Award for, "Most Weird" goes to - MARIE"

I had to let Marie know that she had won the award for, "Most Weird".

Stay weird my friends.

A Coded Lunch

Decoded:  "Marie, I hope you can read this.  You are incredibly weird!"

Today she looked at me and just shook her head when she saw this.  She said she would decode it when she got to school.

- Stay weird my friends.

She's the weird one.

Just plain, "Weird".

We have always had fun arguing over who is more weird.  Today, I thought I would remind her.

Upside down!

Updside down message.

An upside down message for my daughter.  I told her today that I wanted to know her friends' reactions.

"This message is upside down.  Please take all the time you need to read this because I don't want you to hurt yourself and have to see a doctor or go to the hospital because you hurt your neck.  Enjoy your day."


Stay weird my friends.

It's her BIRTHDAY!

How could I not give my daughter some birthday lunch weirdness for her birthday?

"MARIE is 13".  Wow!  OMG!  Holy Cow!, Amazing!  Awesome! Woo Hoo! Yay!

Be weird, my friends.

How it began

4/25/2016

This all started when my wife asked me to start making the lunches for our children.  We have four, plus our nephew so making lunch is quite a large endeavor.  When she was done making the lunches, my wife would label the bags with each kids initials.  The labeling would be as follows:

"J" = Joey
"M" = Matt
"D" = Dan
"E" = Eric
"Marie" = Marie

As you can see we could not use an "M" for Marie's bag because it had been used for my other son.

What the lunch bags normally look like.

So when I started making the lunches I labeled them the same way... for awhile.

One day Marie started calling me a "Weirdo".  I knew she was just kidding around, so I threw it right back at her, calling her "More weird".  It would go back and forth until one of us would give up, then we would both laugh about it.

So one morning I labeled her bag with a "W". She immediately picked up on this and of course, we both laughed about it.  Soon it evolved into me labeling her lunch bag with the following:

MTWOTW

When she didn't know what it meant, so I told her it stood for, "Marie, the Weirdest of the Weird".  She laughed, of course and took it to school.  This started a tradition of me writing weird stuff on her lunch bag. 

So recently Marie came home from school and told me that her friends were incredibly disappointed.  She showed up to school with a lunch bag labeled, "Marie" because mom had made her lunch that morning, not me.  No weird letters on her lunch bag.

So yesterday I made up this:

Hi.  I"m Marie's lunch bag.  I carry a tastey (sic) and nutritional lunch which Marie will eat. (At least I hope so)  It is my sincerest wish that this lunch will give Marie the nutrition she needs to be really REALLY WEIRD!!!  TTFN

And so it begins.

Stay weird, my friends.